So it came about that we found ourselves
leaving England’s Manchester Airport
one cold, wet miserable morning in

mid-winter and arriving in the warmth
of Egypt’s Luxor Airport, just as the sun
was setting in a clear cloudless red sky.

Yes, I do mean red.

The head-spinning bedlam of immigration
control and customs scurried past and we
were ushered on board a coach, to be scared
 witless by our hectic driver on the way to
the Corniche, where our boat awaited us.

What side of the road do they drive on here?
Any side they want to. Whoa? Believe me.

The custom is to drive at night without lights
until one sees an oncoming vehicle, and then
one puts ones headlights on to full beam.

It’s scary, at first, and the passengers at the
front of the bus went white, but as everyone
in Egypt seemed to be playing by the same
rules we were in good hands and hastened
on our way whilst honking the horn with
relish at each and every pedestrian we saw.

Well, it's the custom to let them know that
danger is approaching, or so they tell me.

On route we are sternly lectured by the
Tour Representative to drink only bottled
water and to wash one's teeth with it and
under no circumstances were we to drink
the tap water, and we must wash all of our
salads and fruit in bottled water, or else,  
Pharaoh's Revenge would descend upon
us, with a vengeance, and as it turned out
she wasn't joking, and some did catch it.

On board the boat, or ship, take your pick,
we settled into our fully air-conditioned
cabin with its twin beds, en-suite shower,
w.c., radio, mini bar and laundry service.

We were conveniently situated within a few
paces of the all-night reception area, the Gift
Shop, filled with marvellous Egyptian cotton
goods and 18ct gold jewellery, the spacious
well-appointed Lounge and the Restaurant.

Talking of which we were scheduled to have
our evening meal whilst the ship got under
way heading downstream, which means going
north and that takes some getting used to,
for an overnight journey to Qena and the
fabulous "Indiana Jones" temple at Dendara.

So on to the restaurant where we were
overwhelmed with the vast quantity of food
on offer, and those colourful Egyptian sweets
and pastries, so many, so tempting, so very
super calorific, so eat them. So we did.

The food was delicious and the friendly
waiter service was second to none.

French-Trained Chef Hassan saw to that.
His Oom Ali (Bread and Butter Pudding?)
was to die for with its never-ending layers
of bread and butter, raisins, cream, and
chocolate, more cream, and more chocolate,
and more raisins, and even more cream,
and topped off with a huge red cherry.

The meat selection was huge with cuts of
meat in a multitude of shapes and colours.
It was all described as beef, because
that's all that the English eat, is it not?

Beef, camel, goat, lamb, who cares?
Throughout the cruise the food continued
to be excellent and many a happy hour
was spent lazing on the covered sun deck,
sleeping off yet another exquisite meal,
by the cool of the open swimming pool.

Eat, sleep, drink and be merry, and
don't forget to visit a few of the sites.

I mentioned I used to work on ships
and before I knew what was what I was
spirited down below to the Engine Room,
at the behest of the Chief Engineer,
to see his beloved new diesel engines.

All lovingly cleaned and polished and
happily pushing the ship along at a
steady 16 knots towards our destination.

The crew obviously loved their ship.

There was regular evening entertainment
on board with a Disco Lounge and Bar
or one could use a reclining deck chair
on the Upper Sun Deck and just watch
the world float by in the cosy warmth
of a pleasant balmy quiet evening.

Wintering in Upper Egypt is pleasant.

The days are not too hot, but it is still
advisable to wear a hat and sun cream,
 as the red faces in the group photo can
testify to the sun’s heat even in winter.

Everyone joins in the fun on party night.

Audience Participation Night is great fun
when one can buy or hire native costumes
and pretend to be pharaohs and princesses
of Ancient Egypt for the evening.

Everyone has a great time accumulating
memories of this trip of a lifetime.

The evenings are cool, but not chilly
and as for rain, most locals have
never seen rain in their lifetimes.

There are very few mosquitoes about in
winter so one can stroll around in comfort.

Evening entertainment is colourful and brash.

Nubian folk dancers strut their stuff and
encourage the tourists and crew to join in
with them for some good clean fun.

Pantomime Horses and Wild Men from the
Jungle pursue the young ladies with gusto.

Tanoora, the Whirling Dervisher can spin
in circles for half an hour without getting
dizzy and puts on an excellent show of
mind over matter with his twirling skirts.

The Egyptian national pastime of Belly
Dancing is usually confined to hotels but
beware of being dragged on to the dance
floor if one has knobbly knees. Don't ask.

Green Fields of Sugar Cane line the banks of the River Nile
 

 
Sugar Barges, a Pilot's Eye View and another Nile Cruiser

Relaxing on the Upper Sun Deck and Home Sweet Home

 
The Friendly Crew and some Funky Chicken Laundry

Last but by no means least let me introduce
you to our excellent resident Egyptologist
AMR (Ammar) who lead the excursions to
the many tombs and temples that we visited
on our cruise and to SAM (Essam Serry)
the Managing Director of Isis Travel.

Mr Serry was travelling incognito as a
fellow tourist to check that everything
about the holiday was as it should be,
and although he never did figure out
how I knew, when he did know that I
knew, we got on like a house on fire.

His assistance when Sandra caught the
Pharaoh's Revenge was invaluable and
we are can not thank him enough.

Who ate the tomato without washing it?